Amazon Reviews of Win Your Child Custody War

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Customer Reviews

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We bought 2 Copies: One for us, the other for our Attorney September 16, 2005

Reviewer: Cai Towns (USA)

I recommend this book for anyone who has kids. Especially if you are or foresee yourself going through any type of custody decision or change of any kind. Some of the information is common sense and secondhand. Some of it we have already tried and failed and/or succeeded. But the majority of it is stuff we never even thought about....

Fantastic book... I bought the first copy for my husband... He is going through an ongoing custody "MESS" on a regular basis. Our attorney requested a copy and I bought it for her also. She also praises the book.

The Only Child Custody Resource Book You'll Ever Need! , May 23, 2005

Reviewer: Sandra Humphrey "Children's Author and Character Education Consultant-www.kidscandoit.com Minnetonka, MN

This book is impressive in both its depth and its breadth. It is a practical "how-to" book, but it is extremely well researched and covers every imaginable custodial issue. No one involved in a custodial battle should enter the courtroom without first reading it. With this book everybody wins--mothers, fathers, and especially the children. Highly Recommended!

Yes, it is a war!, May 3, 2005

Reviewer: Barbara Donahue

A fantastic book with hard hitting and realistic approaches to the most difficult "war" you could ever imagine. Don't let anyone tell you it's not a war, because it is, and it is the only one that will ever matter to you. Barbara Donahue Author, "The Anti-Rules, Now That You've Got Him, How Do You Get Rid Of Him?"

This book is quite a resource!, April 1, 2004

Reviewer: Kurt A. Johnson Marseilles, Illinois Top 50 Reviewer

This large and information-packed book is the secret weapon needed by anyone who is presently or might soon be involved in child custody proceedings. This book is *NOT* a set of battle plans, telling you how to beat down the other side, but is instead a clear-eyed look at what you should do and how, for the best of yourself and the child. It covers everything from simple conflict resolution to selecting an attorney, collecting and documenting pertinent information, court, costs, child support, and crisis situations. Basically, this book is an encyclopedic set of information, covering everything you might need to know, allowing you to be prepared for anything that might come up.

This book is quite a resource! If you or anyone you know is soon to be involved in a child custody situation, then the best thing that you can do is buy this book. It is good to be prepared, and this book is just the preparation needed.

Best custody book on the market, period, September 16, 2003

Reviewer: Mike Rogers "Mike R." Seattle, WA

The "Win Your Child Custody War" book is the best, most comprehensive book on the market. I'm a reviewer for SPARC, a divorce and custody web site (www.deltabravo.net) and we recommend the "Win Your Child Custody War" book before all the others. There's no secret to why we recommend this book so strongly- it's just the best guide to custody issues available anywhere at any price.

The breadth and depth of the information is astounding, well-written, and logically arranged. This book is worth 10 times the cover price, and I don't say that lightly.

There is nothing like the "Win Your Child Custody War" book; nothing even comes close. This is, in our opinion, 'the' book to have. You'd have to buy about 20 other books just to start to equal the information contained in this one.
(And just in case you're wondering, we have no connection to Pale Horse Publishing, we just think their books stand head-and-shoulders above the rest.)

An excellent battle resource from someone who's been there, August 11, 2003

Reviewer: Michael Davis Phoenix, AZ

Charlotte has produced an excellent and thorough work on the subject of child custody battles. And she speaks from experience; she has been in the trenches, having done battle herself. An enormous amount of research has gone into this book, based largely on personal experience. This is clearly evident. This invaluable resource is available to all, a work no one should be without in a child custody battle. I work in the legal industry as an investigator and former law enforcement officer and have had the privilege of working with Charlotte. She is an intelligent, sincere and tough-minded, down-to-earth person who cares about others' custody cases. Don't go to court without using this book!

I Used This Book To Win!, April 21, 2003

Reviewer: Jay Faber Le Mars, IA

I am a custodial father who endured a prolonged campaign. Horrible legal advice and strong gender bias plagued my initial effort in 1993. I made many of the mistakes common to parents in these situations and paid dearly.

Later, as our case progressed, I was fortunate enough to discover the manual entitled `Win Your Child Custody War'. These pearls of wisdom are a treasure trove of the information, advice, and warnings that everyone engaged in this war needs. I only wish I had found this gem when the battle began! The result of this discovery was winning custody of our then 10-year-old son.

This resource is bulging with common sense strategy. From the preferable negotiated settlement to the Desert Storm attack, a wealth of useful tips is readily available for you to implement immediately. In the appendices are your sources for an abundance of intelligence, including a tutorial on how to read legal documents. I even offer it on my website, WinningChildCustody.com, where I provide information to other parents involved in US and international child custody disputes. This brilliant work definitely made all the difference in my case and it can in yours as well!

10 star value for usable information, April 8, 2003

Reviewer: Beth Hartford-DeRoos "motherlodebeth" Top 100 Reviewer Jackson, CA

This is by far the most complete and well written book on custody issues and the copy I have will be given to the local library as a reference book because I think it is a must read for anyone going through a custody fight. Thankfully I am still married thirty-five plus years and have never had to deal with the issue, but have helped a number of men gain custody of their children.

If there is one thing I do not like about the book it would be the cover photograph where the little boy appears to be dressed as a small U S marine. Having family in the military and in a real life and death war, I think a photograph of a variety of children from different ethnic backgrounds would have made a better cover.

6 Stars out of 5 ... Just Do It!, March 18, 2003

Reviewer: A reader

Great resource, Interesting reading, Much more than I had hoped for. Don't let it overwhelm you. Use the Table of Contents and Index and take it one step at a time. The best money I spent on my custody case was on this book. Powerful, wonderful, enlightening. I highly recommended this book.

Divorce and Custody- Do it Right for Your Children!, March 7, 2003

Reviewer: Claire SutherlandGreenville, NC

I bought Win Your Child Custody Battle. In the first chapter the reader cannot help but shift their thinking to "what is best for my children?" This book does a masterful job of steering a divorcing parent through the custody war, and showing that parent how to WIN! While making sure their children WIN! too.

What makes this book better than the others is:
1. It teaches you how to win so that your children ultimately have what they need
2. It teaches you how to win so that the other parent is not killed in the war, you learn how to use anger constructively!
3. It does not favor either parent, like books just for Moms or Dads
4. Both parents could use the information in the same custody battle and do the best job for their children!
It is the best, most complete book on the subject I've ever seen.

I have them all., February 15, 2003

Reviewer: "dadof4sons" Modesto, CA

Read a review of 'Win' in the Modesto Bee several years ago. I remember because I cut it out for the shop steward at work. Then things went to #?%@ around here and I saw a battered copy of "Win" two months ago at a Father's for Equal Rights meeting. The guy who had it used a hi-lighter so much I thought the pages were supposed to be yellow. Tried to buy his but he would't give it up. This edition looks to have twice the information his 99 edition. When the smoke clears around here I'll take the time to read it from cover to cover. For now I use the index and a blue hi-lighter. My marriage status may be changing but my parental status is going to stay the same. I am a good dad. I have every one of the custody books www.Amazon.com could get for me. "Win" is the most complete. Highly Recommended!

Did the reviewer from MN buy the same book I did?, January 5, 2003

Reviewer: A reader

I bought this book after reading the great reviews here on Amazon. When it arrived four days later I was blown away. I won't be spending so much time on the penalty bench. (I now see some of the problems I was causing myself.) No more AAA behavior or attitudes. Child custody pulls you into the majors. This book has so much information and so much I can do. I wanted to post a review before I got past the first chapter, but couldn't put it down. Interesting and instructive. I may have to start a business brokering this book because everyone who looks at it wants it.

I don't know which book the reviewer (sounded like a woman) from MN read, I found no random, mindless, essays. I found what all the other reviewers (including the Amazon reviewers) found on target, powerful options that I could adjust to meet many situations.

It sounds like she bought the book in the last inning of her fight and didn't have enough time to score any points. Even if you don't have much going for you this book will get you some home runs. But you need some time to put together a team, make a game plan and get on the field on time.

Don't just buy it. Use it.

Midnight Companion, June 30, 2002

Reviewer: Patrick Devine Carmillo, CA

I was doing ok (not great) during the day. Facing the [stuff] they threw at me was easier when mixed in with seeing my kids, my job and all my other responsibilities. Nights were long, painful and left me exhausted. If I was finally able get to sleep, I would wake up in a few hours in a panic or with their latest assault eating at my guts. It would be different if I could go into the kids rooms and see them sleeping safe in their beds. I never felt so helpless in my life. I am a good, no a great dad. I love my kids. I shouldn't have to be a part time dad. They need a full time dad. I think this book is going to help me show the judge who I am and how much I can contribute to their lives. I found this book on Amazon at 4a.m. one morning and felt better just having ordered it. It arrived in 5 five days. It has helped so much that I can get to sleep. On the rare occasion that I do wake up worried, "Win Your Child Custody War" is my Midnight Companion and I can always find something to calm me by giving me a plan of action for the next day. The examples of what other guys have faced and how they handled themselves are valuable. Seeing the results (good and bad) of the actions I would have taken has given me a real heads-up. I don't feel helpless any more. I think this is the next best thing to having a great lawyer in your pocket 24/7. Borrow, steal or buy a copy.

Worth Every Dollar, June 8, 2002

Reviewer: A reader

They say this book is updated more often than any other on the market. Now that I have it I believe it. My attorney said she is is impressed enough with it that she is going to order one for herself. It isn't the cheapest book out there but I have spent so much that another 80 bucks just didn't matter. My children matter. It all boils down to that doesn't it.
I thought I had it bad because I live in a big city and couldn't find anyone who would take an interest in what I was facing. At a father's rights meeting I met a guy from a small town. His ex-wife's family has so much influence he couldn't get a local attorney to take his case. Then the small town court treats the out of town attorneys like interlopers. When he saw my book he took some notes and then ordered one. I keep in tough with him and we compare notes on our cases and what we are learning about from the Win Your Child Custody War book. I am thinking of starting a men's study group for child custody. I think this book is a Great Buy!

Great Book, April 22, 2002

Reviewer: Jim Candy Arlington, VA

This is a great book. Truly the top of the line if you are facing the battle I am. I read, plan, do and re-read. I get more out of it each time. If you think you need help... you have just found it.

The Amazon.com reviewers are right!, April 11, 2002

Reviewer: Jodi Lincon Firebird Lake, AZ

I have purchased over a dozen child custody books from Amazon.com and I always read the reviews. I am especially interested in the reviews by the top 100 reviewers. Sometimes they are off base. Not this time. They really nailed the value of this book. I wish I had bought this book first. I would have handled many of the problems differently and would have gotten a lot farther along in my case if I had. I highly recommend this book to women even though I think it may have been written primarily for men.

An incredible resource -- Very highly recommended, December 31, 2001

Reviewer: C. Penn "WordWeaving" Top 100 Reviewer Greenville, SC

Choosing to give my ex-husband custody of our very young children was one of the most difficult decisions I have ever made. Later battles for visitation rights and custody have been the most painful events of my life. I have endured restraining orders based on lies, long distance visitation, and the psychological devastation of being separated from my children. My case went to the worst of extremes when my lawyer resigned my case in order to testify on my behalf in court. Because of the injustice of the handling of the restraining order, my case was used as the example that changed a school's non-custodial parent pickup policy. Along the way, I made many of the mistakes common to parents in my situation and learned many lessons the hard way. I wish I had WIN YOUR CHILD CUSTODY WAR when I began those battles; the information, advice and warnings would have made the battle far easier.

WIN YOUR CHILD CUSTODY WAR provides the legal details and information an informed parent needs before and after hiring a lawyer, detective, or even a psychologist. WIN YOUR CHILD CUSTODY WAR sets realistic expectations, includes straight talk with no mollycoddling, and lots of sound advice. Logs, affidavits, and home studies are covered with meticulous detail and with sound examples. As the author cautions, however, readers also need to follow the advice of their lawyer over the book. For example, in the extreme case of a parent who does not want to visit the child and would stop harassment if not required to pay child support, the author suggests: "You could get counseling, legal assistance or return the money the court sends you each month from the other parent." I know from personal experience that you could return the parent's money in the state of AR. In the state of GA, the money isn't yours, it belongs to your children, and you are required by law to accept the money, just as the non-custodial parent is required by law to pay. No exceptions.

Encouragement and common sense are also included in the WIN YOUR CHILD CUSTODY WAR. Some battles are better walked away from, especially when the battle becomes a matter of winning and not necessarily in the child's best interest. WIN YOUR CHILD CUSTODY WAR forces readers to carefully examine their own motives, behaviors and attitudes. It also warns of the pitfalls many parents fall into, and provides tips for how to avoid them. As I turned the pages, revisiting my own battles, challenges and mistakes, I couldn't help thinking of the emotional pain this book could have saved me. Simple things like plan an activity for when you return the children to their custodial parent would have been useful advice from the beginning of my battle. In addition, WIN YOUR CHILD CUSTODY WAR is very sensitive to the issues non-custodial mothers face, especially considering the harsh judgment society places on women without custody.

This is the most personal review I have ever written, but given the nature of the book, I feel compelled to obrer personal confirmation of the value of WIN YOUR CHILD CUSTODY WAR. Surprisingly, I also found a lot of self-forgiveness as I read this book. As I revisited old wounds and previously second-guessed decisions, I found confirmation of my own good decision-making, giving the book a remarkably positive spin for this battle weary, but successful warrior. Very highly recommended.

Child Custody Worst Case Scenarios, November 20, 2001

Reviewer: Katie Picks City of Industry, CA

Amazon.com is great! I ordered the 2000 edition of the Win Your Child Custody War book and Amazon sent me the 2002 edition. Besides the good service the product is exceptional.

I don't face more than three of the challenges discussed in this book but I wanted to know everything that could happen. This book could have been called "A Compendium of Worst Case Scenarios in Child Custody Litigation".

Initially I was interested in the psychological and home study evaluation examples. As my case has progressed I have found additional help in the book for several situations. The most remarkable change has been in how the discussion of how my soon to be ex husband and I have stopped demanding our rights and now discuss our responsibilities to our children. He saw the change in my attitude and what I had to say and has finally started to follow suit.

This book gave me the ability to build a strong case which diminished the fears I had for my children and myself. I stopped feeling and acting like a victim. I can't make him be the kind of husband I wanted him to be but I can help him be the kind of father his children need him to be. The removal of fear has allowed me to speak my mind clearly and listen without becoming emotional.

Combat, November 12, 2001

Reviewer: Donald Mitchell http://billiondollarbusiness.blogspot.com Top 10 Reviewer and a citizen of the world based on Boston

If you have an unusual child custody case (such as you want to get sole custody of a child your husband fathered out of wedlock while married to you), can afford to spend $100,000 on the case, are willing to devote all of your attention to winning, and want to know as much as possible about how to decide what to do, Win Your Child Custody War is the right book for you.

If you think that using the courts to get a better custody deal is an easy, simple, inexpensive path, this is also the right book for you. It will hopefully present you with the reality of what you will go through and encourage you to seek a simpler solution.

Child custody battles are usually about the emotions of the adults, and reflect the child's interest as an excuse to "punish" the other adult. In chapter 13, there's some helpful material about how to minimize the negative impact on children during divorces and changing custody relationships.

Most women going through a divorce of separation hit some situation that scares them almost to death (such as you go to pick up your child, and find an empty house with all the furniture removed). These issues are dealt with very well in chapter 15.

Chapter 16 does a fine job with how to deal with various kinds of child abuse, false allegations of child abuse, and actual cases of kidnapping.

The author has been through much of this, so you're dealing with someone who knows the ropes. However, remember that this is a resource guide. The chances are very good that you will never come up against 95 percent of what is described here. Also, you don't really have to know the roles of the various courts (up to the Supreme Court) as they are outlined here.

Ms. Hardwick consistently encourages you to settle peaceably and quickly, whenever possible. That's good advice. This book would have been a lot more valuable, however, if it had dealt with custody issues from the perspective of what most people will go through rather than the relative few who will face drug-dealing, fly-by-night, ex-cons during the custody battle. If your former spouse or lover is a person of good character and has moral habits, you will eventually settle this issue by having the two of you sit down without any lawyers around and calmly talk it over. Many people don't want to do that, and create lots of problems for their children while wasting tens of thousands of dollars in the process that are badly needed for some other purpose.

Although this book will teach you how to run a very effective child custody law suit, my advice is to avoid doing that if at all possible.

Think of the children's interests first, second, and third . . . even when you are looking out for their interests!

everything you could ever think of, October 30, 2001

Reviewer: M. H. Bayliss "book queen" Top 500 Reviewer

I was amazed at first that this book was written by a non-professional, but after reading it, I can see that the author went through much of this stuff personally and learned a great deal. Lawyers only tell you so much, but this book examines the issues from various sides. It is VERY comprehensive. You can read it cover to cover (it's very absorbing) or use the excellent indices to find almost any topic you need to know. Some of the material (like the detective reports) is fascinating. There is a ton of helpful advice. The only problem with the book is that it's SO big that it can seem overwhelming until you realize that you don't have to read everything, just what's relevant. I like the fact that the author emphasizes that you should do everything NOT to fight in order to protect your kids. Many feel a custody battle is about who wins and who loses, but the biggest losers tend to be the children.

I was ready to do court like on TV. WRONG, August 17, 2001

Reviewer: Allan PicardAtlanta GA

Everything I knew about family court, I learned from television. It didn't take me long to see that the prevailing mythology I had accepted had me going in the wrong direction. Win Your Child Custody War offers options that helped me deal with the conflicts in a way that had real meaning to me and gave me the knowledge and skills to help me achieve my goals within the limits of my budget and resources. My sons are counting on me. I wanted and needed the best help available, this is it.

My attorney told me to buy this book!, August 17, 2001

Reviewer: Donald Goldman(Ann Arbor, MI)

When my attorney told me to buy this book I thought he was abandoning me. I was wrong. Win Your Child Custody War helped me explore the parts of my personality that were charged with emotion every time I had to deal with my ex-wife. I learned the predictability and intricacies of the "dance" she had always suckered me into. Specific techniques and practical strategies that applied directly to my case were easy to employ. It is great to have a product that meets my needs at each level of my challenge. Buy this book and hope the other side doesn't know it exists.

I liked seeing the real thing., August 17, 2001

Reviewer: Brook Able Scottsdale, AZ

A friend recommend the Win Your Child Custody War manual to help me prepare for psychological and home evaluations. I was very skeptical that one book could cover so much information in such detail. Seeing the 10 home studies and psychological evaluations removed a lot of the "fear of the unknown." I have actually enjoyed much of the reading and many of the examples. The 7 detective reports are amazing. Even if I wasn't so emotionally involved I think I could recommend this book as just good reading.

Clearly worth the money, February 10, 2000

Reviewer: stevensa NYC

Has many common sense things. Gives good advice and ideas. I've read numerous other books, but this one is best. Teaches taking the high road. Is good for both men and women.

Has sample forms you should fill out and a reference section that is unsurpassed. written by non-professionals who have gone through it.

Helping Children and Parents since 1992